Through the Looking Glass

I've had nothing yet, so I can't take more.

2009-02-16T11:43:00.002-05:00

I was devistated yesterday. In building this fund for a castle, I had, perhaps permaturely, picked one out. I found out that this particular castle I had my eye on has received an offer on it. The market in the area is terribly slow. I asked how could this happen, why did they pick this one. Of course I realized they picked it most likely for the same reasons I fell in love with it. After some upset, I refocused myself. Everything happens for a reason. I have always wanted to live in a castle, not live in this particular one. There are others for sale. I had two others on my list, both are for sale. They get listed, they sell, there are others. This one, for what ever reason wasn't meant to be, it wasn't the right one.

We're All Mad Here

2009-02-03T18:06:00.002-05:00

Absent I have been of late, distracted by the things of daily life. But I have brought myself back into focus. My birthday is this month. I am hoping that my friends, instead of gifts and cards, will support the castle fund. One dollar towards a castle is cheaper than a Hallmark, and no matter how many tears the lovley poems would bring to my eyes, supporting me in this means so much more in the long run.

I have been handing out the Dream Castle Cards to people who have donated. I am hoping to have some of them back soon to display the lovely art of the dream castles of others. Of course I realized that I had one teensy tiny spelling mistake that somehow was overlooked in my proofing. On the bright side, they will be pasted in the memory book, with the back side down and in time the spelling error will be a vague memory.

The sun has been out for three days in a row. That always seems to bring hope during these cold months. I can't wait for spring. A time for new beginnings, for things to blossom.

Well my friends, I shall endeavour to chronicle my journey more often, stay focused, and work my way dollar by dollar to my castle.

Let me see: four times five is twelve, and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is -- oh dear!

2009-01-22T20:45:00.003-05:00

One number. That is all it takes. One number. Someone said to me the other night "everybody's got to have a dream, but yours is bigger than most." It is still just one number. Of course that number is 4,999,620 . This same someone said I will never reach it. It is because 4,999,620 people think the same thing that I haven't. . . . yet. Everyone's got to have a dream.

The lottery is 43 million. I bought tickets today. No, not out of my castle fund. Fingers crossed.

Do you ever feel tired of hearing people telling you that "you can't." You can't have this, you can't have that, you can't have both, you can't, you can't, you can't. I am tired of it. I have heard it all my life. What if it never occured to you that "you can't." Imagine what you could have accomplished so far in life. Imagine what you could accomplish from this point forward.

My father said "good for you, and if you never reach 5 million to buy your castle, at least you will have money for therapy." He laughed. I laughed. But he still supported me. He didn't argue. He didn't say he wouldn't support me on principle. He is there for me, cheering me on all the way. Like those of my friends who not only dare to believe, but support me no matter what the dream.

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

2009-01-20T07:47:00.005-05:00

Yesterday my Dream Castle Cards arrived. What are these things you call Dream Castle Cards you ask? The wonderful idea of Dream Castle Cards came about while brainstorming with Juju. I was trying to figure out how everyone could share in the dream. She was saying that it was too bad we couldn't make a sort of art project for people who gift towards it, like people drawing their dream castles and having some way to display them later. From there blossomed the idea of Dream Castle Cards.

Dream Castle Cards are essentially post cards with "draw your dream castle" on them. People who gift money to the castle fund can draw (or paint, or collage, or print and glue, be creative) their dream castle on a card and return it to me, inperson or by post, and I am going to put them all in a memory box or album (this may need to be plural).

When people come to stay at the castle hotel they can sit in the library, order a drink and look for their Castle Card or admire others wonderful works.

They arrived yesterday, it was with great anticipation that I opened the box. There was just one teensy problem. They upgraded me to glossy! Imagine being disapointed that you got a bonus upgrade. I can laugh at my initial thoughts now. I am sure they will be fine.

Each gift helps us get one step closer to our dream. We would love to have your dream Castle Card displayed in our memory book. Look for Dream Castle Cards soon on www.jenniferscastle.com

Speak roughly to your little boy.

2009-01-13T09:03:00.004-05:00

Today my horoscope read: Try not to be too critical of someone who let you down recently. Be compassionate.

Yes, compassion. That wonderful humane quality of understanding the suffering of others and better yet, wanting to do something about it. Isn't that exactly why I have felt let down recently?

The skies have been so grey, with only brief moments of cheery sunlight. The snow if falling now and I suppose it has brought about one of the pity party days we all seem to suffer from at times.

Everyone has their own life, their own concerns, their own goals. But it never ceases to amaze me at how quickly people are on my door as soon as they need something, need support, need help, need a shoulder to cry on, need something from my closet, need things for their wedding, need advice, etc. I rarely ask for help, even at the inconvience of myself. This is my issue, one I am working on. But many these same people seem to laugh and disappear like faeries into the wood when I have stepped forward and asked for support in this dream of mine.

When out last night I ran into Johnny Uruguay, (we wish you all the best as you embark on your travels by the way). His advice was "Don't rely on anyone you think you can rely on. They won,t be there for you."

I only need 5 million people to each give me one dollar for this to work. Laugh if you want. Stranger things have happened. It's not that these friends won't give me a dollar. It is that I would just love for them to show support no matter what my dream is, no matter what my endeavour, without arguing on principle this or that. Just believe. Share in the dream. Live the dream.

I think I have finished my rant. Now to start to feel the compassion for their suffering and to get into the mindset that given a cape and a nice tiara, I could save the world.

Tut, tut, child! Everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.

2009-01-12T08:09:00.005-05:00

That's nothing to what I could say if I chose.

2009-01-09T07:56:00.003-05:00

Inspiration. Creativity. Muse. Vision. Whimsical. Vivid. Avant-garde. Conjure. Nuture. Spark. Nature. Ancient. Folklore. Ocean. Faery. Dream. Reverie. Lost. Flow. Ebb. Understand. Support. Love. Peace. Harmony. Castle. Wish. Believe. Hope. Cherish. Antique. Relic.

I've read that in some book, but I don't remember where.

2009-01-04T17:49:00.003-05:00

"We cannot live fully without the treasury our ancestors have left to us" George Mackay Brown.

There was a large table under a tree . . . .

2009-01-01T19:27:00.002-05:00

I am always amazed at the creativitiy of my friends. I suppose I naturally gravitate to people with some sort of flare. On quite a number of ocassions, I have heard many of them say soemthing along the line of "with all the talent we have there has to be something we could all do." We all dream about it and then the conversation drifts.

Anyway...One dear friend and I have decided to inspire each other on in a quest to achieve some such goal. This is wonderful, I am so excited to get back into a few things I should never have stopped doing, and each step will take me closer to my dream. But why stop there.

I put it to some of my friends today, that if they are serious and not just making conversation (Ouch! I know that was harsh, but some are very good at ideas and not so good on the follow through. You know who you are, smile and accept it, don't be mad at me Richard) that they should join in inspiring each other, networking, cross-promotion, etc. I asked that if they would be interested in some such endeavour, please let me know. This could be the beginning of something bigger than each of us alone. I know all to well that it is too easy to dream about it and hope it happens all on it's own. It would be lovely to actually do something about it.

Last day of the year

2008-12-31T18:23:00.003-05:00

So many things have transpired over the last two years. It is hard to believe how time has slipped away so quickly. I suppose that am glad to see the year come to a close and a new one to blossom. It is so easy to feel remorse over the past and to fret about the future.

It is also easy to wish for things to happen on their own. Where are the elves that are supposed to do it for you in the night while you lay in peaceful slumber. I need to find my motivation, my muse. There are so many things I would like to accomplish this year, but in having so many, they build and grow and lead to new and even more exciting ideas. As I mentioned before, I only have the one resolution. It will make it easier for me to stay on task. I think that so as long as I remember to occasionally interrupt the flow of inspiration and innovation I may actually get things done.

Oh, and as my lovely friend Carol said "As I was dreaming of riding through the forest at Jennifers Castle It occured to me that every one should make it a New Years resolution to give generously to the cause."

Happy New Year to all who stopped by for a visit, or who stumbled upon my little place.

Come Dine With the Red Queen, the White Queen and me

2008-12-27T15:28:00.005-05:00

I survived the holidays; laughter, tears and all.

My lovely friend Cindy is always looking for signs. Numbers in sets of threes. While stopped at a set of lights, I asked for a sign on Christmas day. Then I noticed the plate on the car ahead of me. The numbers on the plate began with 111. I looked the numbers up. "it is a great sign of a golden opportunity, a "doorway" has opened up in which your intentions and goals will manifest extremely quickly."

I sit now, facing the New Year and all that it will bring. I have thought on what, if any, resolutions I would have for the coming 2009 and decided to have just one. To strive to make my dream of having a castle come true. It may take more an these coming months for it to happen, of course. Although it is a part of it, one can not simply visualize and pray and hope that fortune will present itself. You also have to walk along a path, you have to help things happen.

With the exception of Monday, I have this week off. I am going to organize my ideas, make lists, prioritize, visualize, get a little sewing in, and see where things go from here. If you are in my neck of the woods, please stop by for a tea.

Pig and Pepper

2008-12-21T22:11:00.002-05:00

When I awoke this morning, I saw that the grounds were covered in a quite a fall of snow. Travel would not be easy, and the stores would be filled with unhappy shoppers anyway. I decided to work on my planned website for the castle fund. I finished the stylesheet and general look, and put it up for testing. So far the reviews have been good. I will be registering the domain later this week, and up she will go. From the site, I hope to gain awareness of my quest, thank people for their gifts/donations, and a few other things still in the works. Look for a note on Castle Cards coming soon!

I knew it would be a challenge to convince people that I am serious about purchasing a castle. It seems however that those who call me their friend are the first, with the exception of the White Witch of the Beamish, to be naysayers. Come on, you know who you are. You all comment on how I am generous to a fault, going out of my way to help people even at an inconvience to myself. I have not asked for much in return. But if you don't ask, you don't recieve. One dollar, that is all I am asking for. Every dollar counts. It's less than the amount to send me a Christmas Card. It's less than buying me a coffee. Gift me those pennies you don't want to roll. You can probably find it on the floor of your car.

Painting the Roses Red

2008-12-19T21:24:00.003-05:00

I forgot to mention weddings! There is a chapel, grounds, dining for 10, or canapes for 40. The bride and groom are to make arrangements for the minister. I am not sure if there is currently a discount if all rooms are rented for the weddin, but if not there will be. I was in the wedding planning industry for a number of years. It would be a pleasure to help couples plan a romantic dream wedding in our castle. And loving research, I have been reading up on some local traditions and customs.

My own wedding was modest. I had mentioned to, my then, fiance that we should just invite closest friends and family. He said no, we should only invite closest friends and immediate family. We celebrated our wedding in an evening ceremony on Valentine's day. We were married in the local library, the house of books. Our minister was the mother of our dear friend Julianna. As an aside, Julianna was the first to believe in the dream and contribute a gift to the castle fund. My best friend, Krista, was my maid of honour, and my daughter Ophelia was our flower girl.

It was not until years later when we attended Richard's cousin's wedding that I realized why he had insisted on immediate family only. It was not because they were not close, it was because they are an old Nova Scotia Acadian family. Only about 500 of the relatives were able to make it and attended Lynn-Marie's wedding. I don't they would have all fit into the little library hall. However the castle grounds would be a wonderful location for a number of tents and a family reunion.

Drink Me

2008-12-19T19:32:00.000-05:00

I have been asked by a number of people what I plan to do once I have aquired my castle. There are a few things that I wish to do. It is already running as a hotel. I wish to continue to run it as such.

There is farm land which is rented out. I would like to continue to do this and not develop it as others may have ideas to.

There are protected marshlands where birds nest each year. At the end of the breeding season, there is an annual shoot. Having grown up on a pheasant game farm, I am not opposed to the traditional hunt, which is on the land with a hired hunter to run it, and I would welcome the hunters return each year.

There is an ancient woodland. I have always wanted to live near a sacred oak grove. I will settle for sycamore, horse chestnut, alder, larch, rowan, whitebeam, willow and elm. There are a number of paths through the woodland. I need to research the law on the scattering of cremated remains, if it is allowed at all, where it can be, does it have to be set up as a scattering garden, etc. Along with this, I would also, law permitting, be able to offer the burial of placenta. I do not know if there are additional planned areas, or if there is something such as Trees Ontario, but if possible to continue the growing of the area of the woodland. And if you need some sort of lucrative reasons for the ideas for the woodland there really are't any, however people may come and stay at the castle once every few years to revist the woodland and visit their loved ones.

There is a small building, which if brought up to code, would be a wonderful art studio to offer art classes where people could sketch and paint the wonderous sights they saw on the boat tours my husband will give them. My husband loves boats and the water and would love to give boat and land tours, not to mention that he has the gift of gab.I am not sure if there is one, again more research to do, but an arts festival to display the varied talent of local artists and artisans would be nice.

I belong (on again off again) to an historical re-enactment group. One year a chapter was contacted by the Make A Wish Foundation. A little girl's wish was to be a princess for a day. I was not able at the time to help on this ocassion, but my heart went out to her. I would love to be able to offer an extended weekend once a year to such a child and their family through the foundation to be King or Queen of the castle.

There are many other ideas, they all intertwine and complement each other, but this has been a glimpse into some of them.

The White Witch

2008-12-17T23:14:00.000-05:00

It seems that convincing people who do not know me that I am going to buy a castle is a little harder than anticipated, and I did not anticipate that it would be easy.

We arrived at the pub. As we sat at our table brainstorming ideas of how to let people know that I am serious about wanting to raise the funds to purchase a castle we were approached by a woman. She asked if she could put her wine glass on our table while she went to the WC. Then she asked were the scratchings on the napkins about. At work they call me the White Witch. Don't waste your money. It will never happen. It's a pipe dream. You dont' want to go to the UK. Then after some british-accented-ramblings she said not to listen to her her thoughts were impaired. Where are Ryerson students filming documentries when you need them? I do not wish to imply that I do not believe in messages from the other side, witches, seers, or fortune tellers by any means. It was simply her drunken presentation, timing on being so against it after hearing about it. You really had to be there. She then followed us outside to talk about it further. Her husband trying to drag her away, their taxi was at the door and was going to leave with or without them. How many people told her that moving to Canada would never happen, not to go, it would be a mistake.

I know to some it may seem a pipe dream. Stranger things have happened. Too often in life I have given up and listened to the naysayers. What might I have accomplished if Ihad only followed my own path rather than their rantings.

Advice from a Caterpillar

2008-12-17T09:01:00.000-05:00

With the Canadian dollar down, the castle I have in mind will be about $5,000,000 cad, and although not an easy task, stranger things have happened. So, for my castle fund I am:

* Accepting donations in person or by paypal on my website
* Using money from my cafepress sales
* Using my tip money from work
* Money from the sale of my possessions I can't take with me
* Money from my ebay sales (as soon as I start selling on there again)
* Did I mention I will hem pants?
* Various other plans still in the works.
* I also have some equity in my house, but we may need to use that for the relocation expenses.I am serious about this.
* Trying to put the money I would spend at Tim Hortons into the fund
* A portion of the proceeds of the sale of my limousine
* Putting all of the above into a daily interest savings account.

If anyone has any other suggestions (reasonable ones that is) please let me know.

The Queen's Croquet Ground

2008-12-16T08:44:00.000-05:00

Ever since I was a young child, people have thought me old. I simply thought of myself as misplaced, born in the wrong era. I have always wanted to live in a castle. Yesterday began my quest to live the dream.

Costumes & How I Was Inspired to Sew

2008-11-20T23:28:00.000-05:00

Momma had mastered the art of the safety pin. That is to say that she didn’t really sew. In our house were knitting needles galore and a beautiful bag of miscellaneous buttons that were often my favourite play thing. I would sort them by size, or by colour, or by number of holes, and then put them back into the lovely velvet bag that housed them. It would only be later in life that I would discover that the embroidered “Crown Royale” did not imply that these wonderful bits of Bakelite and plastic had come from the remainents of princesses’ gowns. Millie Francis was my sitter growing up. She was steps away from Kindergarten and she had a box of costumes and if we were very good we could play with them. Millie’s mother, who we called Nana Jeffery, lived with her and had crafted most of them herself. I would often sit with Nana Jeffery in her room. Her mouth looked like she carried a hedgehog in it with the number of pins that would protrude from her lips.It was in late October that Nana Jeffery told me I could borrow the Pocahontas costume for my kindergarten party. I was so excited. Millie’s daughter Marsha had once worn it, and it was the prize of the collection. The day before the party it was gone. It was no where. Then Millie said that Danielle, who had come into our class and to our sitters that month, had taken it home. Danielle. Her mother probably knew how to sew. How could this happen. I was in tears. I didn’t have anything for the party. Momma came to the rescue. She always did. She was going to stay up and make me a bunny costume. I loved bunnies. I slept with my toy “Bun Bun”, who had one button eye from the royal bag of buttens. I had a number of little bunny pets as well. I even had a white fuzzy hat with two dangling strings with white fuzzy pompons on them and would often hop around in the snow pretending I was a snow bunny. It was my favourite. I went to bed imagining how wonderful it would be in the morning to have my own bunny costume.For those of you who may be too young to remember, flour used to come in sacks. These were often saved for various uses in our house. I would like to say it was for environmental reasons. But momma had lived through the depression. She was a pack rat and saved everything. The next morning I awoke to find a flour sack lying on the dinning room table. A hole for my head and two for my arms had been cut from the seamed end. One of the pompons from my hat had been diaper pinned to the back. Three carrots were tied by the greens by a piece of rickrack. I was wearing a flour sack. My favourite hat had been butchered. I arrived at school to face Pocahontas in all her glory. To make matters worse, a girl named Shawna ate one of my carrots. That Christmas, my Santa list had one item on it, a Holly Hobby Sewing Machine. I received that, along with a bundle of purple fabric, which was oddly the same colour as my old bed sheets. The greatest gift had not been the machine, but the will and the drive to learn how to use it, to overcome all, and to be able to say that after 32 years of experience behind a sewing machine, I have yet to master the art of the safety pin.